Tag: sick

Maybe It’s Just Part of Being A Mom

Posted on January 24, 2014 by Jennifer Wolfe

Blue Sky (Photo credit: dcarrero)

I’m sitting in one of my favorite rooms in the house in the middle of the day on a Friday. It’s quiet here today; I can hear the sounds of my husband’s guitar students quietly picking through chord progressions on the other side of the house. My son, home sick as well, fumbles around in the kitchen. These everyday sounds that I usually miss feel somehow comforting as I reach for another tissue.

I know some people who can just sink into the idea of being sick. They relish the ability to wear yoga pants all day, not have to put on make up, and sweat with excitement at the opportunity to plow through the huge pile of books and magazines on their bedside table.

Sick day at home…at least I have a new book. #whatareyoureading #awelltemperedheart via mamawolfeto2

I’m envious of those type of people.

I suppose it would make things easier if I lived in the part of the country where the Polar Vortex is in full force. Somehow, downing DayQuil and sipping hot tea would be much more pleasant if the snow was piling up outside and I had a blazing fireplace to lounge in front of. Instead, I’m gazing out the window of my study, watching the birds dart about against the backdrop of azure blue sky, and wishing I was doing just about anything else but sitting here, blowing my nose, and coughing into my elbow.

I despise being sick.

And yes, I know fighting it is the wrong approach. I know I should let it go, just not worry about anything, rest, drink lots of fluids and let myself heal. But that’s not how Type-A people operate. Instead, I ruminate on what’s going on in my classroom with a substitute teacher (I’m sure my students are loving it!), I worry about how my family will adjust our complicated weekend plans, and look around at all the things I should be doing if I’m at home and not working. In other words, I’m probably making myself sicker.

I wish I could just let it go.

I actually think it’s more than just being Type-A. I think, really, it’s about being a mom. For the last 18 years I’ve had to put other people first. I’m not saying that in any sort of martyr-ish fashion; it’s simply been my role as a mother to think first of the needs of my family, then my own. I’m a caretaker, and actually, care-taking is what’s gotten me into this bed in the middle of the day on a sunny Friday afternoon. I don’t feel resentful at all – just a little perplexed at the irony of it all. And it’s funny-when I feel like this, I think first to who can take care of me; it’s not anyone in my immediate household. I think to my own mom, and how she would bring me saltines and 7-Up when I was a little girl, and run a humidifier to help me breathe. How she would cut the crusts off grilled cheese sandwiches, and make sure that I had everything I needed.

I wish she was here right now.

I wonder if she ever got all our germs? I don’t remember her ever being sick. Maybe, just like me, she didn’t mind. Maybe, just like me, she loved taking care of us, and catching a cold now and then was just part of being a mom.

I think I’ll relax on that thought.

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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Snow and Sickness and Those Horrible Mommy Moments of Panic

Posted on January 16, 2013 by Jennifer Wolfe

12 12 Tahoe and Mammoth 052

I was sick for most of the winter vacation. Really sick. Runny, sneezy, want-to-claw-out-my–itchy-eyes sick. For days. This is NOT how I wanted to spend my vacation. I imagined a long, restful break full of cooking, baking, laughing, skiing, long walks in the snow, dinner with friends, games by the fire…not exactly what I got. Instead, I was on the couch, tissue close at hand, too tired and grumpy and feeling sorry for myself to be pleasant company for anyone besides my family. They had no choice. It was everything I could do to not invite the whole Tahoe basin to my pity party.

Why is it that teachers always get sick on their vacations? Not fair. Who was the little creep who infected me with this?

The other bummer about being sick, besides thinking about all those sick days you’re NOT using, is that when you’re a mom, no one takes care of you – and you still have to take care of them.

Actually, now that my kids are teens it’s much easier. Those baby years were rough-I guess I do have it easier now. I don’t have to change diapers, rock them to sleep or read Curious George for the millionth time. But they still needed to be fed, and in the snow, grocery shopping is a huge ordeal. I wasn’t up for that at all. No endless circling the parking lot for a space, slogging into the store, pushing the shopping cart through the snow (that’s a fun one – have you tried it?) or heaving over-packed grocery bags through the four feet of snow to our door. So, I did what any mom would do: I sent my son to the store. On foot.

Ok, it’s not as bad as it sounds. There is a mom-n-pop type store just down the snowy icy, street. He can’t drive, but he can walk.

I slapped $20 in his hand, gave him a strict lecture about walking on the highway versus the road (I told him to choose the road-he’s quick, but jumping out of the path of a sliding car is not worth it), and sent him off. It was daylight. It was just down the street. It was just for some eggs.

I watched him walk away, headphones over his ears, smile on his face. Happy to be helping mama, or happy to be out of the house?

30 minutes later and it was getting dark. No sign of teenager, eggs, or anything else that would alleviate my anxiety. I was ready to call out the patrol. But, I was sick, on the couch, and in my bathrobe. I had to fight my natural urge to hurl myself through snow banks to go find him. My baby was out in the snow. In the dark. Sensing my impending eruption, my husband volunteered.

As he geared up, amazing thoughts flashed through my mind. Images of my son taking a detour, going to the highway for a shortcut, bounding through snow banks. I imagined the sirens racing down the highway on the way to pick him up, the phone call, the hospital…I was way gone into future-trip land.

Just when I felt I was about to burst, something dark caught my eye. There he was. I spied him out the window, sauntering down the street, carton of eggs in hand, and headphones on ears. He wore a huge smile on his face.

I exhaled all my anxiety, and tried to use the next sixty seconds figuring out how to handle myself. I couldn’t yell. I wanted to scream and release all my rage and fury about what he’d put me through.

Angrymamawolfe.

I fought the urge to run out into the snow and throttle him. I figured the best bet was to play it cool, act as if I wasn’t worried.

Coolmamawolfe.

He walked through the door, stomping the snow from his boots. “Mom, I spent some time down at the lake. It was amazing. The sky was so beautiful. I took pictures.”

Amazedmamawolfe.

My heart melted along with the clumps of snow on the hardwood floors. What a fool I am. What a silly, foolish worrywart. What a paranoid, over-protective parent.

I wanted to give him a lecture on the dangers of wearing headphones, but his sheer joy took it out of me.

“You’d be so proud of me, mom. I checked the expiration dates. One carton expired tomorrow, so I didn’t buy it.” I could feel him growing up as he spoke.

You’re right, Cam, I thought as I hugged him close. You have no idea how proud.

Through Cameron’s eyes:

the sky was truly amazing, wasn’t it?

I see why he wanted to get closer…

that’s a little too close, Cam

OK, so there was a bit of goofing around…

Tahoe Pines on Dwellable

Jennifer Wolfe

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As Long As You Don’t Get Sick

Posted on November 27, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

image courtesy of freedigitalphotos.net

Have you heard the latest news about Obamacare? Along with those Americans who want to secede the Union after Obama’s re-election, we now have 17 state governments that want to reject key elements of Obama’s health care reform – before it has even taken effect. I just don’t understand.

Oklahoma. Wisconsin. Maine. Texas. Louisiana. All run by Republicans.

While states have until Dec. 14 to decide if they will run their own exchanges, as stated in the health care law, these governors have already decided that they would rather not allow Medicare expansions and other facets of Obama care for their constituents.

So what happens next? What if you are one of the poor and middle-class Americans living in these states that would benefit from Obamacare? The states’ refusal to expand Medicare will severely affect millions of people, both in their coverage as well as tax credits. Most importantly, they will not have access to services they need to prevent and provide care. What will these people be forced to do? What would you do to take care of someone you care about? What if it is your parent? Your spouse? Your child? Will these states force their residents to cross the state border and move where care is covered?

The sad part to me is that until people get sick, they don’t understand how seriously flawed our insurance system is. They don’t understand until it is their family member who needs treatment, a diagnosis, or even just a test to determine what their next steps might be. They don’t understand when the only hope might be a clinical trial, like those performed by cureLauncher, and the only way to know if you qualify is through a test that the insurance company won’t pay for and you cannot afford. Trust me, it’s not a time to fight over who deserves to have medical care paid for or not. You might think your current insurance is fine, and it might be – unless you get sick.

So governors, please listen to the people. Our country voted for a man and his policies because we believe in them. Don’t quit before it has even started. Don’t be sore losers. It could be you who becomes ineligible next time.

Jennifer Wolfe

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No Substitute

Posted on November 9, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

I am not a very good sick person. I don’t like stuffing my pockets full of Kleenex, dosing up on Sudafed, and trying to make it through my day. But I don’t like the alternative, either. Hunkering down in the house with a stack of unread newspapers, that novel I’ve been meaning to finish since last summer, lotion-infused tissues, a remote control and satellite TV isn’t what I’d exactly call my dream day off.

No, I’m not a good sick person at all. I don’t savor the time away from my students. When a teacher is sick, there’s still work to do. Teaching isn’t the kind of job a person just doesn’t show up for. Those kids don’t sit quietly and study when the adult decides they can’t make it to work that day. The substitute doesn’t just show up and create a fantastic lesson plan guaranteed to make them forget all about me. Sad to say, when I get sick it just gets harder. I’m stuck with what’s the better of two evils: trying to communicate intelligently to my students between blows of the nose, or trudging down to school in the dark to write step by step plans that anyone walking in off the street could present for four different classes? Not an easy one.

But this week, I had no choice. I was down for the count, and hunkering under the covers was my only option. So I did what most teachers do-teach one day, write sub plans, stay home, teach the next, write sub plans, and stay home.

It’s not that I think I’m irreplaceable. Hardly. I know there are many young people out there looking for work, eager to earn a paycheck. But in my experience, not many of them are substitute teachers. Last year my students reported that one of my subs whipped out a grapefruit and proceeded to eat her breakfast at my desk during class. Another one surfed cars.com on my computer. And still another decided to ditch the lesson plans I’d prepared for my English class and instead gave a drawing lesson and then proceeded to decorate my classroom with student art work.

Now don’t get me wrong-there are some subs out there who do an awesome job. They really do substitute for the teacher. They take their job seriously, follow the lesson plans, organize the papers, and spend time helping students. The problem is that these subs are the ones everyone wants, and when I’m requesting someone at the last minute those stars are not who are available to show up in my classroom.

So, I’m not a very good sick person. Or maybe I’m just not very good at letting go. I remember junior high-have mercy on the substitute. It really is one of the toughest jobs out there. But in the big picture, what difference does a day of chaos here and there really make? Maybe I should just settle in, drink my herbal tea, catch up on the news, and get lost in HGTV and rest. Maybe I’ll even get lucky when I go back to work, and those students will be glad to see me. I know I’ll be glad to see them. I’m really not a very good sick person.

Jennifer Wolfe

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