Tag: teenagers

Homework Help for Teens

Posted on April 12, 2012 by

We’ve all been there. The progress report cards arrive and grades are not what we expected. Or, we check online and cannot figure out why there are so many zeroes where there should be numbers!

Are you tired of feeling the weight of your child’s homework? Are you done arguing and ready to start making a change in the way your teen does school?

If this is happening to your family right now, relax and try these five tips to get your teen back on track. I’ve tested them on my own students and children, and know they work!

1. Take a deep breath and let your teen talk. Kids want their parents to hear their side of the story. Listen as they tell you what they think is going on. Try to stay quiet and not interrupt – just nod your head until they’re done. They know you’re disappointed.

If you’re ready for more homework help tips, click here to read more on Yahoo!Shine.

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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Driving Lessons Part One: The Early Years

Posted on January 18, 2012 by

“Well, at least now I know not to floor it going into the driveway while cutting off people and scraping the front of the car on the curb,” my 15 year old daughter reflected after putting the car into park.

We all know that this day is coming.  Parents are always marking off the milestones with our children-first tooth, first steps, first words, first day of school, first loose tooth, first ….driving lesson?

I decided to handle this milestone by putting the responsibility with my daughter.  If she wanted to drive, she needed to be mature and responsible enough to make it happen.  She would be obligated to research the online driver’s training course, sign up and complete the requirements.  All I needed to do was provide the credit card number.

So she did.

Then it was time to take the written test.  Again, the ball was in her court.  She must research the hours of the DMV, figure out how to set up an appointment, make the appointment, study for the test and then show up and take it.  All I needed to do was drive her there.

So she did.

Turns out the written test wasn’t as easy as she thought.  She needed to figure out a different way to study and approach the test.  All I needed to do was buy the DMV app from iTunes.  That would buy me a few more weeks.

So I did.

I have a determined sort of daughter, it turns out.  She studied and studied and eventually passed. The look on her face when she realized that she had gotten 100% was one I’ll never forget!  My elation diminished quickly when I realized the next step: behind the wheel.

Again, she had to do the set up.  Some might call this denial on my part – I call it strategy.  Each step she accomplished on her own showed me that she was mature enough to handle driving, and allowed me a bit of time to get used to the idea.

When the day came for her first lesson I trembled with nervousness like she was going on her first date.  Her white haired instructor, Luther, pulled up and quickly took her to his car.  This milestone wasn’t as satisfying as her first word or her first steps.  This one stung a little.

After what seemed like hours sitting in the driveway behind the wheel, she slowly backed out and drove off.  My baby-behind the wheel of a bright blue Honda.

Two hours later she returned.  No bumps or bruises or tear stains on her face.  Her coy smile told me everything went ok, and Luther confirmed it.  “A bit fast on the turns” was his only comment, aside from telling me that she now NEEDED TO DRIVE EVERY TIME WE GOT IN THE CAR!

What?  Did I hear him correctly?  Every time?  There must be some other way…some type of driving simulator? My little red Prius doesn’t have a driver’s side set of brakes-how will I survive?

Like her first steps, her first words and the first day of school, I survived.  The fear of the unknown haunts me as a parent.  I knew what life was like when she could only crawl, would make baby signs for things she needed, or was only in preschool part of the day.  I could never imagine how it could be any better than that moment, or how any age could me more special.  But somehow, it was, and so is she.

Watching my first baby behind the wheel makes me think about all the lessons she’s learned in the last 15 years.  She has learned the confidence it took to research the driving school.  She has learned the responsibility it took to complete the online course.  She has learned the determination it took to keep studying for the written test.  She learned the poise it took to drive off in an unknown car with a strange man.  And she’s learned that her mom trusts her enough to put her in charge of a lethal weapon – my little red Prius.

I hope she is learning how much I believe in her.  I know she can do anything she sets her mind to.

To be continued…

mamawolfe spends her days teaching and parenting, and her nights writing about it.  
Visit her blog mamawolfe for more life lessons and opinions on the world today

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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Friday Photo: Some Soup and a Story

Posted on January 14, 2012 by


“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” – Maya Angelou

For a moment on Wednesday night, I was worried.  20 freshmen and sophomores, gas stoves, sharp knives and the need to prepare and serve dinner for 40+ people in less than an hour?  I questioned my choices.

As my students trickled into the shelter that night I quickly jumped into teacher mode and soon had the industrial sized kitchen humming with activity.  Onions were chopped, meat was browning, cornbread was mixing up and tables were being set. 

Little by little, my nervousness was replaced by problem solving.  No measuring cup? No problem – use an app to convert cups to tablespoons.  No, I don’t know how to use an industrial sized coffee maker – find someone to help you. And they did.

After a while, any passerby might have thought these kids were running the kitchen of the best restaurant in town.  They were even wiping up after themselves!  As they cooked they bonded with each other, and eased their own jitters about meeting the strangers waiting outside the door.

The real lesson came after the food was prepared and the homeless guests lined up to be served.  With eagerness and compassion, these children served men and women who were actually not so different from themselves. Slowly they ventured towards the dinner tables

Sitting side by side and sharing a meal broke down the scariness.  Stories began to move back and forth, child and adult bonding over simple food and a common desire to get to know each other’s story.  I stood back and watched the transformation, and beamed with pride at the acts of compassionate justice occurring before my eyes.

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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Middle School Madness: What Parents Can Do To Help

Posted on December 28, 2011 by

 

Masonimages

Middle school can be the most confusing time for students and parents in their educational career.  Everything ‘known’ about school is shifting, and hormones are often kicking into gear at the same time.  Students want more independence, and parents want to do the right thing.  Instead of letting teens ‘sink or swim’, try a more balanced approach.  Teens definitely need to learn responsibility and independence, but they also require structure and supervision more than ever.  By following these simple tips you may be able to crack the middle school confusion code and have a more happy and stress free experience.

Step 1:  Attend Back To School Night, Parent Nights and Open House.

Everyone has busy schedules, but this is an important show of support to your child, their teacher and school community.  These nights often are times to sign up for email lists, learn about the course, and at a minimum get a ‘visual’ of where your child spends their day, and who their teachers are.

Step 2:  Expect homework every night.

Follow the school’s homework policy or create one of your own.  If you teen says they ‘don’t have any homework’, ask to see their planner or sit down with them to check the school or teacher website.  If they truly have nothing assigned, require them to read a book, graphic novel, or magazine of their choice for 20-30 minutes.

Step 3:  Set aside a regular time and quiet place to study.

In middle school it is important to create and/or maintain good study habits.  Not only will it help improve grades, but will assist students as they enter more rigorous high school courses that count towards college entrance.  Bedrooms, kitchen tables, and family rooms all can be acceptable study areas as long as they are equipped with a writing surface, are relatively free of distractions, and have a place for teens to store their school supplies and books when not in  use.  Many teens are able to listen to music while studying-TV and computers are generally more distracting.  Also, turn phones on silent to discourage the temptation to read texts while concentrating.

Step 4:  Check your child’s planner/backpack/binder regularly.

Not every teen is a born organizer.  They need help finding a system that works for them.  Teach them how to use a calendar to write down homework, preferably something that will clip into a 3 ring binder.  Try using one binder for all classes-it will cut down on the misplaced papers and forgotten assignments in lockers.  Once a week, dump out backpacks and book bags.  Hole punch loose papers and put in their binder behind dividers for each subject.

Step 5: Make studying fun.

Some teens have shorter attention spans than others.  Try setting a timer for 15-20 minutes of solid concentration.  Take a 5 minute break, then resume studying.  Make sure they have a full tummy-hunger can be very distracting.  Try Skype or FaceTime-teens are social by nature and may surprise you with their ability to work with a partner.  Studying with a friend at home or in a cafe can also be a nice change of pace.

Step 6:  Provide encouragement, clear expectations and logical consequences.

Middle school is a time for kids to learn what works and doesn’t work for them.  Rewards and consequences are an effective tool to help teens stay on track.  Try to use a one week system-many kids today are used to instant gratification and waiting for a month or two is too long.  Figure out what they really like, value or want and use that as your motivator!

Step 7:  Be proactive with teachers.

Middle school teachers often have 100+ students.  While they may want to contact you, often times they aren’t able to let you know about problems and successes as soon as you’d like them to.  Make sure to get on email distribution lists.  Send teachers an email every week or two asking specific questions about your student.  Think of yourself, your child and their teachers as a team that is working together to provide the best educational experience possible.

Step 8:  Expect success and understand struggles.

Teens are bound to encounter subjects that challenge them in middle school.  Earning straight A’s is not in every subject.  By setting high expectations yet understanding their struggles teens will learn that you are listening and care about them.  When teens are scared to talk to their parents about grades it becomes unproductive and unsafe.  Encourage them to do their best everyday, and understand when they make mistakes.  They’re still learning!

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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Prom Night At Our Place

Posted on December 13, 2011 by

I am definitely not a person who is into cliques.  As a result, I’ve never been much of a joiner of clubs, groups, or anything that labels.  I even resisted junior proms and senior balls as a teen.  I don’t think at 16 I was thinking that I was being ‘true to my authentic self’; I just knew that something didn’t feel right, and prom wasn’t the place for me to be.
As a middle school teacher and survivor of the teenage years I know the damage kids can do to each other by labeling, stereotyping and making exclusive groups.  As a mom, however, I was really pleased to be nominated as the “cool” place to hang out and prepare for the junior prom.  As it turns out, kids in our town don’t need to have a date in order to go to the prom-what progress since my high school days!  As a result, I had ten sophomore girls arriving to my house in waves to primp, polish and prepare for the first big dance of their young lives.
With iPod speakers blaring the young ladies began to polish toes and fingers in anticipation of the slightly tippy, strappy sandals most would be wearing, despite the 30 degree weather outside.  It was an amazing sight to see that their texting ability wasn’t slowed down a bit by wet paint on their fingertips!
Next, the hair.  Straight locks are out this season-with coordinated teamwork worthy of a football playbook, one after the other the girls strategized the curling process to result in Taylor Swift-worthy tumbling tresses.
Then, the food.  In-n-Out was the request-what girl doesn’t need a big burger and fries before dancing the night away, right?  Washing it down with sparkling cider served in my great grandfather’s tiny crystal wine glasses surely added class to the menu!

Dresses?  Can anyone say micro-mini?  Sheesh…these girls tugged and pulled to ensure no accidental wardrobe malfunctions! Some of the dresses were very, ahem, sophisticated.

The boys arrived next.  Surprisingly there were a few ‘dates’-the sophomore boys seemed to wait until the last minute to ask the girls.  Were they building up courage, or hoping that their last minute plea would be desperately accepted?  Maybe they were just traditionalists trying to do prom the old fashioned way.  Regardless, there didn’t seem to be any problem with only four of the ten girls having escorts-aside from the fact that none of the girls really knew how to act or entertain them while they waited.  Standing awkwardly in their new suits, squeaky shoes and fresh haircuts, the boys waited patiently in the living room for the ladies, while mamawolfe acted as a human buffer between them and the hallway to the bedroom.
Finally, the photos.  With flashbulbs that would challenge any paparazzi, the girls dazzled in a variety of photo combinations.  Yes, there were the awkward groupings of those with dates, those who had been friends since elementary school, the whole group, and the shoes to show off the pedicures.
After all the memories were captured and we all piled in cars to drive to the high school, one of the girls commented, “Wow, you must feel really popular, mamawolfe, to have everyone want to hang out at your house tonight.  It’s the place to be!”
Her comment stopped me cold.  Popular? Not the word my adult brain would use.  Special?  Definitely.  Recognized?  For sure.  Thrilled?  Absolutely.
For me, this year’s prom night was so much more than all the pageantry.  Sure, watching my little girl transform into a young woman before my eyes was beautiful.  Feeling the excitement, the anticipation, and the energy was contagious.  But what prom night really taught me this year is that belonging happens in many different ways.  The girls learned that they don’t need to be joined (literally or figuratively) with a boy to have fun.  The boys realized that if they ask, they have hope.  And now I know that I don’t really need to join anything to be important in my daughter’s life – by being myself she and her friends feel comfortable. Actions speak louder than words.  My house really is the place to be.
What more could a mom ask for?

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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