Category: Parenting

Seven Things You Didn’t Know About Me and Never Thought To Ask – plus a blogging award!

Posted on August 31, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

Wow! What an honor to receive the Versatile Blogger Award from Teachermum today! I am so touched and grateful that she has enjoyed reading my blog! She and I sure have a lot of things in common… teachers by day, bloggers by night, and MOMs 24/7! Please be sure to read her blog and find out all about the term she coined, ‘The Crumple Effect’…I love it!

The Rules after accepting the Versatile Blogger Award are:

Thank the person who gave you the award and link back to them in your post.
Share 7 things about yourself
Pass this award along to recently discovered blogs.

I hope you enjoy these enlightening, funny, supportive and inspirational bloggers as much as I do!

voiceBoks
Coming Home To Myself

Grrl Guide

The Crazy Life of a Writing Mom

Southern Writers Magazine

Chef In Training

Now in order to receive the award…Seven Things About Me:

1. I have really never won anything in my life. I have never won a trophy, first place, or really any kind of award. Wait-I did win the ‘best dancer’ award at my school…not sure if that was a joke, though.

2. When I was a little girl, I was extremely shy. So shy that I wouldn’t talk to most people, and if I went to a friend’s house and anyone but them answered the door I would hide. I’m still shy, but have managed to get over my fear of public speaking enough to stand in front of teenagers every day-and they can be a tough audience!

3. I met my husband at a punk rock concert in the 80s. Neither one of us then looked much like we do now. He had way more hair, I had way less. We were both backstage after the show, and ended up together. That was 26 years ago.

4. I would love to live in a foreign country. I wish I had just done it when my kids were little-now that they’re old enough to have opinions, it would be hard to tear them away from their friends, sports, and school. Well, they might be ok with the school part. Maybe when I retire I’ll buy a house somewhere in a Spanish speaking country and just live there for awhile. I hope they’d come to visit me.

5. I used to drive a VW Thing. It was yellow, it had no heater, and the doors, windows, windshield, and top were removable. There was a plug on the bottom of the floor that I could remove and just hose it out when it got dirty. SUCH a California girl car, and I loved it. My boyfriend (future husband) hated it.

I miss that car.

6. I once was a groupie. I have seen The Cure play all over the world…I can’t even count the number of times I have seen them. I have an amazing vinyl collection of all their music that I just can’t bear to part with. We still own a turntable! I will still see them play whenever they come to California…maybe not in other countries anymore, but you never know!

7. I was an OB-no, not the kind that delivers babies. Although I have done that, twice. I am an original barista. I made a mean cappuccino before anyone even knew what Starbucks was. In the 80s that was the only job I could find with hair the color of an avocado!

Thanks again to Teachermum for the kind recognition of my blog. I guess now I can’t say that I’ve never won anything.

primark

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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Posted on August 29, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

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Jennifer Wolfe

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Playground Paradise

Posted on August 13, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

When my kids were little, trips to the playground were a must. Their energy expenditure was critical to my ability to make it through the day sanely, and I’m sure that they benefited from not only the fresh air and exercise, but from the time to play and explore. After they were dressed, the stroller was packed with snacks, dig toys and a beach towel, we would head off on foot to one of the many kid friendly areas in our neighborhood. One of their favorites was the ‘The Grandma Penny Park”.

This park had all the prerequitsites for toddler paradise: a climbing structure, swings, a slide, soft woodchips to land on and best of all, the merry go round. For kids who needed to test their boundaries and get their wiggles out, this was heaven. For moms, the shady bench in close proximity to the playground was a perfect place to observe-just far enough away to give the kids some freedom, yet close enough to catch them when the fell. And they always did. I was there to scoop them off, brush off the woodchips, pull out splinters, offer sippy cups full of juice, and swallow a few Goldfish crackers before testing their courage all over again. Cries of ‘Watch this, Mom’ resonated throughout the park nearly every second as my babies tested their balance, speed and courage. Playmates screamed, laughed and occasionally argued over who was going down the slide first or who got more ‘under doggies’ on the swing.

Once elementary school began, life was so much more structured. The “Grandma Penny Park’ was visited less and less, as t-ball, gymnastics, karate, rock climbing gyms and play dates because locations of paradise. Occasionally we would stop by to take a quick swing or spin, but the twice daily trips to the playground became a thing of the past. Energy was now expended in a more focused manner. Shouts of ‘Mom, check this out!’ caught my attention as my children back flipped, tucked, and shimmied down every imaginable object. Gone were the splinters and sippy cups, replaced instead with rope burns, blisters, bruises and Gatorade. Hurt feelings from learning how to navigate friendships were soothed with hugs, talks and mommy time.

These days, trips to the playground are virtually non-existent. Teens and preteens are much more likely to find their paradise ‘hanging out’ with friends downtown, at the pool or bowling alley, or gulping down a Starbucks Frappuccino before shopping. Trying to hang onto the innocence of childhood becomes a balancing act between their quest for independence and my thirst to hang on to childhood. Statements of ‘Can I hang out with my friends’ frequented our conversations. Squeezing in the family vacations before college became our mission. So many places to visit, things to teach them, and experiences we want to have as a family.

When we recently stumbled upon Fern Canyon, we were thrilled to watch our kids run, jump, swing and spin in nature’s playground. Gone were the iPods, cell phones, playmates and Facebook connections. Instead, our kids rediscovered their childhood pleasures among the fallen trees, dripping waterfalls and trickling stream. Wooden board bridges offered just enough stability to cross back and forth while presenting them opportunities to test their boundaries. Many times I called out, ‘Be careful” as one child scampered too high up a fallen log, or came close to soaking his only pair of shoes. Declarations of, ‘Watch this!” echoed down the canyon as he darted from one wet rock to another, making it safely every time. There were no swings, slides, or sippy cups in sight, just a mom, a dad and two kids creating their own bliss.

What I’ve learned is that all of us need to find our own paradise. Sometimes we need the structure of other people or events, and sometimes it takes the apparatus of a structure, or the companionship of friends. Sometimes, though, all we need is our imagination and the opportunity to unleash it.

What I’m still learning is how far away to watch, and how fast I need to rush in when they fall, as they always do. I’m learning when to hug, when to wipe the tears, and when to stand back and let them handle it on their own. Paradise found.

Jennifer Wolfe

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The Plunge: Taking A Dive Into Life

Posted on July 15, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

I have never dived off a high dive, scuba dived, sky dived or ski raced. I don’t like heights, and can’t imagine anything worse than freefalling through space. Aside from never having a career as an astronaut or stunt woman, it hasn’t really impacted me that much. That is, until I saw my children taking WAY more chances than I ever have or anticipate doing in my lifetime.

My kids like to go fast and get to the top of things. Since they were independently mobile they have consistently sought the highest point and the quickest route to get there. My son has no fear. I would say that it’s a boy-thing, but his sister is usually right in front of him in line for each adventure. When Lily was very, very small she entertained the parents watching their young swimmers at Community Pool by decisively jumping off the high dive. I think she was all of three or four years old, and she just jumped. I nearly fell off the concrete steps, but she just popped right up and the crowd cheered.

My daughter started gymnastics at age 2 and continued for 12 more years, defying gravity and making me hold my breath at every competition. She only stopped recently to focus on ski racing and proudly texted me in May when she was clocked going 60 mph on a radar gun. On skis.

This week I watched her brother dutifully complete his swimming lessons each day at Community Pool, knowing that when the whistle blew he would be able to satisfy his yearning to fly. Eagerly he scurried up the high dive ladder, trotted along the diving board and flung his body towards the lifeguard tower, only at the very last moment dipping his head down and diving into the deep end. As if time was suspended, I flashed back to years earlier when his sister performed her own defiance of gravity, and held my breath until he surfaced. Over and over again he jumped, soared and dove, each plunge pushing him further and further towards his goal of reaching the lifeguard tower, each leap delineating the courage that I will never have.

Watching my children dive into life, I have learned that I need to trust that they will be ok. They might try different moves, from different altitudes, at different speeds, and sometimes they might even surface sputtering and out of breath. But they keep pushing forward, determined to take it a little bit farther each time, and that makes me shine with pride. What courage they have-courage that I’m still learning. That, and how to not pass out from holding my breath until they come up for air.

Jennifer Wolfe

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the path

Posted on June 28, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

Sometimes we don’t know where we’re headed. Actually, most of the time. This is especially hard if you’re one of those people who likes to know where they’re going-all of the time. Like me.

I’m not much of a risk taker. I don’t like high places, ledges, surprises, or the unknown. I like to have a plan. I like lists, planners, recipes and getting things done. But every once in awhile I surprise myself, and take a step. Sometimes they are baby steps, sometimes, mamabear steps, and sometimes I just jump without thinking or looking. Those are the scary ones to me, and more often than not I end up regretting something about them. Especially when it involves over-indulgence. But lately I’ve taken a few mamabear steps that have actually come out ok.

I was talking with a new friend the other day, and we were discussing what it’s like to be our age and feel like we’re getting to the place where change is really quite scary, especially if it involves careers, money and doing something that other people (younger ones) are more skilled at, more experienced at, or maybe just more courageous. We agreed that sometimes ‘putting ourselves out there’ is essential to open the door of life just a tinge wider, giving us a new view and opening up the possibility that ‘there’ will respond. And the crazy thing is, it usually does.

This has happened to me a couple of times over the last few years, giving me the confidence to now keep the door propped open. Just a tinge. For some of us just taking the jump into parenthood is the opening. For some, finishing school, a project, taking a trip or creating something just for the sake of creativity. Like a blog.

What I’ve learned is that Lao Tzu’s famous quote, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step” is absolutely true. That step can be small, medium, or large, but it’s a step all the same. And usually, if you’re on firm ground to begin with, the step comes out ok. And then another one can follow right after it. If the ground beneath you is muddy, crumbly, or slippery, that step might take longer or require some thought, but it still can be done. What I’m still learning is that I can trust myself to take the step, and to know that there are so many people in my life that will hold my hand if I need help to get down the path.

Jennifer Wolfe

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