Joy Is Not Made To Be A Crumb
I’m struggling with the challenge of teaching our children to soar. I think about it every day, way too often than is healthy. I think about it at home, at work, and when I’m alone in my writing room, trying to clear my thoughts and start the day.
“The light here leaves you lonely, fading as does the dusk that takes too long to arrive. By morning the mountain moving a bit closer to the sun. This valley belongs to no one—except birds who name themselves by their songs in the dawn. What good are wishes, if they aren’t used up…”
“We guess at what’s next unlike the mountain who knows it in the bones, a music too high to scale…”
“Black like an eye bruised night brightens by morning, yellow then grey—a memory. What the light was like. All day the heat a heavy, colored coat. I want to liedown like the lamb—down & down till gone—shorn of its wool. The cool of setting & rising in this valley, the canyon between us shoulders our echoes. Moan, & make way…”
“What you want—Nobody, or nothing fills our short journeying. Above even the birds, winging heavenward, the world is hard to leave behind or land against—must end. I mean to make it. Turning slow beneath our feet, finding sun, seen from above, this world looks like us—mostly salt, dark water…”
“I chase the quiet round the house. Soon the sound—wind wills its way against the panes. Welcome the rain. Welcome the moon’s squinting into space. The trees bow like priests. The storm lifts up the leaves. Why not sing.”
Doing Good When People In The The World Are Doing Bad Things
Our connectivity is a wonderful thing – but with all the good, also comes the challenging.
Last week, listening to the terror and violence of another school shooting left me frustrated, angry, and so very sad. At times like this, being a teacher, it takes a tremendous amount of positivity and trust to walk into a classroom each day, wondering if like so many others, this ordinary day will end up going down in history.
It makes it hard to focus on the good – but in the end, that’s what I have to do. I have to trust in the beauty of people, in my desire to make the world a better place.
The world may, overall, be a beautiful, positive place that has more good than bad, but that doesn’t mean we can’t make it even better. Most people have a desire to do good in the world, especially if they’ve been watching the negative news, but don’t really have an understanding of what they can do. Well, there’s good news: there’s plenty of things that you can do. Indeed, the potential stretches across many different facets of life, such as our careers, hobbies, and roles in the community. Take a read of some of the ways you can make a difference below:
What Can You Bring?
Everyone has something they’re good at. Discovering what you’re good at will be key to figuring out where you can make a positive impact. For example, if you’re a master organizer, then you might want to consider organizing local groups. Campaigning is one of the most effective ways to make a positive difference in your local community, but not everyone wants to play this role. Are you a good writer? Then start a blog, and educate other people about the world. find some platform to use your voice to make a difference.
Looking at your Career
Of course, how much time you can spend making the world a better place will depend on how much free time you have. You do, after all, need to make sure that your job is well taken care of first. But what if your job enabled you to make a positive impact? Take a look at careers in public safety, education, healthcare, or social work, and it will. People tend to think that doing good is something that you can only do in your spare time, but this isn’t true; many jobs allow you to earn a living and make a positive contribution at the same time. If you make doing good a priority, you will find a way to integrate it into all aspects of your life.
We’ve talked so far about the big things you can do in life. But the truth is, you don’t have to over complicate your desire to do good things. Indeed, some of the most powerful contributions are the small ones! Giving up an hour of your time to volunteer, or agreeing to donate a percentage of your income to charitable causes, or any other small gesture can have a ripple effect that stretches beyond the initial deed. If you don’t have the time to do more or don’t know where to start, then just start small and see where it takes you.
Being the Change
Finally, remember that make the world a better place doesn’t just mean going out and affecting other people. It starts with you. Gandhi taught us to “be the change we want to see in the world.” It’s a simple phrase, but oh so effective. Think about the global issues that you’re most affected by, and make sure you’re not contributing to them. You never know who else you might influence just by being the best version of yourself.
You’re not going to solve all the problems by yourself, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try: you might solve one of them! And along the way, you’ll be setting an example for those around you, building momentum, and doing good. Together, we can achieve great things!
What Are Your Early Morning Rituals? How To Wake Up Right
I’m not much interested in New Year’s Resolutions – I’ve written before about my preference for following a mantra for the year and seeing how it unfolds rather than creating some arbitrary list of actions that, if I don’t complete, will make me feel worse than I did when I started. One new year ritual I do follow, however, is starting a morning book as one of my early morning rituals. This year I chose Jennifer Louden’s A Year of Daily Joy: A Guided Journal to Creating Happiness Every Day. It’s a book I’ve used before but never quite finished, but since our Universe somehow keeps on spinning, I’m able to start again. Fresh. So on January 7, when the prompt was to think and write about my early morning rituals I felt inspired – actually, I felt like I was going in the right direction, since before I turned to the page, I had already been musing about how I love what I do in the early morning that helps me wake up right and have a happy day.
My early morning rituals include…
- Going to bed early. Yes, starting the day off right means getting to bed early the night before. Years ago when the kids were little I’d fall asleep next to them, so exhausted from days of mothering and teaching I couldn’t wait to snuggle up with my head on a soft pillow, knowing that sleep would be interrupted but oh, so heavenly while it lasted. Now, with young adults living at home and out of state, I could stay awake as late as their body clocks want them to, but I’ve found that falling asleep by 9:30 p.m. (and setting an alarm for their curfew as needed) affords me at least 7-8 hours of good quality sleep. Oh – and no screen time after 9 helps immensely, too!
- Waking up to an open window and natural sunlight. During the work week, I wake up at 5:30 a.m. Yes – it’s dark, but having my bedroom window cracked just a little bit not only keeps me cool all night but also allows nature sounds to be my wake up call. Just this morning I was greeted by a lovely owl announcing itself, and doves cooing on my back fence while finches chattered on the bare tree branches. Getting up early to see the dawn break over the treetops while listening to my live nature soundtrack reminds me of my small place in this great big world, and is one of my favorite early morning rituals – even in the cold California winter months!
- Candlelight. I love lighting one, two, or sometimes three candles when I wake up. Easing myself into the light of day with natural sunlight and the flicker of meditative candlelight allows my mind to rest, to contemplate and prepare for the busy day ahead.Coffee. I had to add this one – for me, having moments alone with my first sips of a warm coffee with cream in my favorite mug is such a simple pleasure; I feel so strongly about my early morning ritual of calm and coffee that I travel with my own portable french press and favorite beans – there’s always hot water in hotel rooms, and it’s so much better to honor my need for caffeine than put up with a poor substitute.
- Calm.com. Have you heard of the website calm.com? It’s full of beautiful, meditative music and visuals that I not only use in my early morning rituals, but my middle school students love it as well! You can use the app or desktop version, and I love being able to set a meditation timer or just let the music play softly in the background as I go about my rituals.
- Writing and gratitudes. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t have some sort of journal…I’ve handwritten decades of my life in spiral notebooks and cloth bound books, telling stories and sharing memories, documenting quotes, writing to do lists and always starting with gratitudes. I try to write at least five gratitudes every morning – some days, yes, it is challenging to not fall back on those deep core values, but on those days when I am digging deep and reminded of the power of love, home, kindness, and nature, I know I have at least started my day remembering that some things never change. Lately, I’ve been adding a focus for the day – at least one daily goal that I can achieve.
As the season change and my life evolves, my early morning rituals adjust with the times. No longer do I find myself nursing a baby while balancing a steaming mug, or being jolted awake and rushing to a ski hill. This time of life is evolving towards more time for self-care, allowing for more choice and control over how I start my day. Surprisingly, my core early morning rituals still hold up…calm, quiet, nature, soft light, coffee and gratitudes are what start each day off right for me. Bringing positive early morning rituals into your day is one way I know for sure to go out into the world ready to make a difference.
What are your early morning rituals? Do you find they change and evolve, or are you, like me, holding onto what is tried and true?
While I’m pretty excited to leave 2017 behind, I’m grateful for the world I’m creating for myself, my family, and my students. I still believe that together, we can achieve great things – despite what is out of our immediate control, there were so many memorable moments of 2017.
Looking back on the year is definitely bittersweet – there were moments of frustration, fear, change, growth, joy, laughter, friendship and kindness. Above all, there was love. My 2017 mantra was Be Here Now; spending time reflecting on these memorable moments of 2017 reminds me that I did my best, I was present for myself, family, and friends, and I pushed myself to move forward in every aspect of my life. I thank all my readers for helping encourage me along my path and contributing to this one, wild and precious life.
Looking back on memorable moments of 2017:
- mamawolfeto2It’s such an amazing feeling, being surrounded by the most precious people in my world, enjoying life and watching them grow into beautiful, interesting people. I’ll sleep well with both of them under my roof again. #mamawolfe #merrychristmas#lovethem
- mamawolfeto2All I had was an address, but today I visited the St. Louis house owned by my great- grandparents, where my grandmother grew up and met my grandfather. So grateful this piece of history is still standing, full of memories and stories. Sometimes things just fall into place… #thankyouuniverse #spiritstrong#stlouishomes
- mamawolfeto2This amazing teacher- loved talking and learning together this weekend at #fallcue2017 – thanks for letting me jump into your #hyperdocs session! #pln #teachertribe@sarahlandis
- mamawolfeto2Such a great weekend hanging out with the #hyperdoc girls – thanks for the inspiration! @lucky_hilton #ilovemyjob#teachersofinstagram
- mamawolfeto2Setting up for my live TV cooking demo- catch me at noon making spaghetti with sautéed eggplant and #cucinaantica tomato basil cooking sauce #cookingtime #livetvisfun #studio40#mamawolfe
- mamawolfeto2Super excited for the new school year! This is how I will welcome my students every day- I’ll hold the door open for them and remind them that they can do ANYTHING! #teachersofig #growthmindset#powerofyet #teacherlife #backtoschool
- mamawolfeto2Last morning at the worksite. It was bittersweet. The Davis kids performed for the community, we brought a piñata, played soccer, took last photos and said goodbye. Next stop- Granada. #kidsbuildingschools #payitforward#Nicaragua #travelgram #teachersofig
- mamawolfeto2Loved spending the morning at the SLC Farmers Market and adding to/starting our silver spoon cuff collection. #smallmoments #growingup #happymama#silverspoon #saltlakecity #gratefulheart
- mamawolfeto2Last day of an awesome #STEM conference – ready to get new projects going at school. #middleschoolteacher#sandiegogram #steamgirl #stemsolve#teachersofinstagram
- mamawolfeto2A rare opportunity to all ski together…no foolin. #happymama #tahoelife#homewood #skifamily
- mamawolfeto2College tour stop #2. Babson preview day- stunningly beautiful campus. #collegetoursbegin #babsoncollege#happymama
- mamawolfeto2Well behaved women rarely make history. #womensmarchsacramento#notmypresident #lovetrumpshate
Wishing all of you a happy, healthy and memorable 2018 – I’m ready to #embracechange and see what adventures the Universe has planned for me! I sure hope we can continue to connect here and on social media – please follow mamawolfe on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram to share our adventures!
So tell me what are you ready for in 2018?