Tag: writing

My Car Is My Quiet Place

Posted on February 15, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

Call me weird, but I really like to sit in my car – it’s my quiet place. Alone.

It has nothing to do with driving-I like that, too, especially when it’s on the open highway. What I’m talking about are those rare moments when I’m completely locked in my glass bubble. The engine isn’t running, the radio is silent, and if I’m lucky, the rain is gently falling on the roof.

When I was a kid, I used to love going in our garage when it was raining just to listen to the soft, rhythmic sound of rain hitting the shake shingles. It felt safe, quiet, and I guess meditative, although I had no idea what that was at the time.

Today, I spend my days in an endless gurgle of people wanting, needing, and questioning. My continuous ‘response with a smile’ feels exhausting by 4p.m. and I find myself craving quiet. That is where the car comes in.

I don’t slip out to the garage and leave my family inside the house wondering what’s up with Mom. I don’t drive around the block searching for a place to park. Sometimes I do linger after I’ve arrived home, savoring the last of the NPR story, or taking a few deep breaths to center myself.

My car sitting time is often while I’m waiting for my son or daughter to finish a class, an activity, or some sport that doesn’t require spectating. It’s best when I park in a quiet neighborhood without many pedestrians peering in the windows. I prefer daylight quiet in my car, although I do keep a Halloween style skull lantern in my glove box to shed a little light as needed.

What do I do in the car? I sit. I write. I think. I grade the endless papers that my students provide me every day. I don’t like to talk on the phone, but I do occasionally check my email, play Words with Friends, or send a text or two. I write lots of blog posts, I do lesson plans, and once in awhile I’ll read a book or catch up on the newspaper. I even keep a blanket handy.

Once I did fall asleep – it was dark and after dinner – that felt a bit embarrassing and disorienting. As my teenage daughter would say, it was ‘sup-awk’ to wake up to the chatter of kids leaving their class knowing I had been snoring with the windows open!

Mostly I find that I breathe, sink into the seat, and just slow it down. I let my heartbeat match the rain, and concentrate on me. Most of the time people don’t notice me there, and I like that.

Now that I’m an adult, I don’t get to hear the rain on the roof of our house. The sound of rain hitting skylights just isn’t the same-it’s more of a ping than a satisfying thud. But when I’m alone inside my car I hear it all-rain, the wind, birds, dogs, and passers-by all create a meditative backdrop to my thoughts.

As a turtle needs to retreat into its shell to protect its soft body, as a chipmunk scurries into its hole, and as a rabbit retreats to its den, I need a place to go and shut out the world. The demands of a job and a family can, just for a moment, stay outside the bubble. Safe, dry, and protected, I can breathe in and out, and find my center again.

Call me weird, but I really like to sit in my car. Alone. Quietly. What about you? Where’s your quite place?

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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It’s All In How You Say It

Posted on February 13, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

I believe that most people don’t obsess about language as much as an English teacher does. It’s our curse. We can’t overlook a misplaced apostrophe, an incorrectly spelled word, or a dangling modifier. English teachers know language, and we have radar to catch those who abuse it.

It’s all really for a good cause. Language experts are all about communication. Using the written word to convey our thoughts, opinions, emotions and information is our forte. And when it’s misused – watch out. You’re no match for us.

Surprisingly, I don’t have a problem with ‘net speak’. My students use it as they do any other second language, and they know when to switch back and forth. And if they forget, well, I surely remind them.

What really gets me going, though, is poor word choice. It’s laziness, simplicity and thoughtlessness combined. Word choice really ruined my week. I had an unfortunate encounter with a word that no educator wants to have in the same sentence with his or her name: layoff. Use of this word in schools from now through March 15 is sure to create high anxiety and low productivity, which is exactly what happened to me.

I received an email indicating that I would be ‘bumped’ in lieu of a potential ‘layoff’ and I had 48 hours to respond. End of email.

Now, communicating by email is a dangerous thing for those who are unable to express themselves well with the written language. Unlike handwritten letters, email has very little emotion or personality to help the recipient understand the nuances of the message. Word choice becomes critical, and unfortunately this week, word choice was just plain….wrong.

When I read the words ‘bump’ and ‘layoff’ my heart dropped into my stomach. I have 10 years seniority in my district and could not imagine what this meant. Twenty-one years of teaching and I’m still worrying about a layoff? This was definitely not the message I wanted to receive at the end of a long school day, but there it was.

I pulled my jaw shut and started to process. I went back into my head and began to spin all sorts of scenarios about what might be going on and how I would react. In other words, I panicked. Layoff is not a good word.

After lengthy discussions with colleagues, friends, the assistant superintendent, and a night spent tossing and turning, another email provided clarification came that ‘layoff’ was the wrong word choice. ‘Bump’ was correct, ‘layoff’ was not. ‘Bump’ isn’t ideal, but it’s sure better than ‘layoff’. One wrong word choice, and my day and night flipped into a tailspin.

Precision of language may be a curse of the English teacher, but there’s a good reason. Words have power. They can bring elation and devastation. They can show emotion and action. Words well chosen and precise give us the ability to communicate at a high level, and words chosen thoughtlessly and carelessly can bring us to the lowest depths of all.

The next time you’re typing an email or texting someone, remember: it’s all in how you say it.

Jennifer Wolfe

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The Universe is Taking Care of Me

Posted on February 6, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

Sometimes we all are so caught up in how we want things to be. Who will win an election, who will find the right relationship, what college our kids will be accepted to, what treatment will be found for an illness, what job might open up for us. We face these all-important, and sometimes critical, issues in life. However, I wonder if perhaps we are all just trying a bit too hard to make it happen.

I will admit I am a cerebral person. I stay up in my head all the time. I like it there. I like to think, to ponder, to imagine what if. I have never been one to jump into huge risks, or vocalize my thoughts immediately as they come to mind. I keep them ‘up there’.

Interestingly, I also wear them on my sleeve. Emotional, shy, sensitive – all adjectives used to describe me my entire life. It’s hard to feel intensely and try to keep it inside. I’ve never been good at lying or keeping secrets. Mix that all together, and I often find myself missing opportunities, misunderstood, or thinking of what I ‘should have said’ 30 minutes after the occasion ended.

So in the last few years I have kind of surprised myself. Surprised my family and my colleagues, too. I’ve decided that I needed to let these feelings and thoughts out of my head and heart and put them in motion. Like a slow leak in a balloon, I let the control in my head move towards my center. Using my contemplative nature, instead of thinking it out I let it settle and sink in. I acted on intuition over intellect and to my great surprise, amazing things started to happen.

I found myself in the mountains of Nicaragua, along with my children and complete strangers, mucking in the dirt and rocks to build a school. I found myself teaching and coordinating a new program at my school to help kids and families find their confidence and success. I found myself on a zip line flying over the jungle to challenge my fear of heights. I found myself applying and earning a government grant to study global education, with plane tickets for Washington D.C. and Indonesia. I found myself writing, testing the voice that began to emerge and finding new writing friends to share and learn with. Now, I find myself writing for Yahoo, my thoughts and words about education and parenting shared with an unlimited audience.

None of these experiences would have happened if I remained locked inside my head. There are too many reasons I could create to explain them away. There are too many risks, too many challenges, too many other people who would be better suited. Except that, the universe is taking care of me.

My writing friend Brenda Moguez, who shares her head and heart with the universe on a regular basis, writes in her blog ‘Passionate Pursuits’, “just once, this singular time, I’d like a leg up, the map, the golden key, the spoonful of sugar, the ruby slippers, and one of the wishes Genie gave to Aladdin. It’s ballsy of me to ask, I know, but I have good reason. I looked at karma’s life ledgers and I am showing a substantial overpayment. The same auditors, who tally the votes for the Academy Awards, keep karma’s book, so the numbers are accurate. Trust me.”

I couldn’t agree more. Karma’s life ledgers do keep the tally marks next to our name. Santa Claus does know who has been naughty and who has been nice. Cinderella’s fairy godmother does turn a pumpkin into a carriage so she can meet her handsome prince. And the Blue Fairy does bring Pinocchio back to life after he proves his bravery, honesty and selflessness.

But all of those magical experiences would remain in the ledger book if not for one thing: the voice and actions that put them out into the universe to be answered. As the great philosopher Bill Cosby says, “In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.”

Is this what holds so many of us back? It’s our lives; we have to want it to happen.

In the end, I believe a combination of desire and action allows the universe to move. Trusting that we will be taken care of, that things will happen the way that they are supposed to, not necessarily how we think they should.

That, and a bit of fairy dust.

Jennifer Wolfe

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3 Fun and Easy Ways to Encourage Your Child to Write More- guest article by Jacob Maslow

Posted on December 15, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

As a teacher, parent, and writer, I know firsthand the importance of written communication. Today our children are learning in a different world than we did, and that can mean some adaptations need to be made to our way of thinking about learning how to write. The stakes are high-if you’re wondering about how to make writing easier for your children, read my guest post today by Jacob Maslow. He’s got some great ideas!

Strong writing skills are crucial for success in high school, college and beyond. Parents can help their children develop their writing skills by reading to them, providing a wide variety of reading materials and encouraging them to practice their writing skills. However, even the most avid reader can be a reluctant writer. Here are a few ways to help make writing less intimidating and more fun for your child so that they get the experience that is necessary to develop into fluid writers.

Make the Act of Writing Easier

Writing by hand is hard work! Many children shy away from writing simply because of the time and energy involved in putting pencil to paper. Like any skill, handwriting becomes easier the more that you practice, but getting your child to practice is often easier said than done.

Parents can make handwriting easier by helping their child develop the fine motor skills that are necessary for writing. Puzzles, modeling clay and dough, stringing beads and lacing and other games can exercise these muscles and help develop hand-eye coordination without seeming too much like work.

Start small when encouraging your older children to practice their handwriting so that they can develop stamina without being too discouraged. Even a few minutes of practice a day can help them improve their handwriting skills. Help them make captions for their artwork or ask them to help make shopping or to-do lists. Play games like hangman, Boggle or Mad-Libs that incorporate writing in a fun way.

Keyboarding and typing are useful skills for older children, but should not take the place of handwriting practice. Writing by hand helps children develop neural pathways that are important for their future learning. Keyboarding should only be introduced as an aid to writing after handwriting has been firmly established.

Use Imaginative Play to Help Your Child Develop Narratives

Imaginative play is popular with early childhood educators because it’s one of the best ways to help children increase the complexity and structure of their inner narratives. Pretend play helps children develop rich inner narratives and to learn how to communicate them to their playmates.

While younger children can’t write down these narratives, the practice they get in composing inner narratives will help them as they advance in school and have to call upon their imagination to compose sentences, paragraphs and essays. Parents can help their child play imaginatively by limiting screen time and providing props (toy kitchens, costumes, puppets, etc) that can help support their child’s imaginative play.

Older children can be encouraged to take their pretend play further by asking them to write out scripts for a performance. Set up a small puppet theater or stage for your children so that they can perform their creations for friends and family. Puppets work especially well since they allow your child to practice writing things from multiple points of view without requiring a large cast of actors. If you have a video camera, older children can also write their own movies, television series and commercials to be filmed to share with family and friends.

Make Writing a Part of Everyday Life

Again, the more opportunities that your child has to practice, the easier writing will become. Formal writing instruction is important, but it’s usually not enough to make your child completely comfortable with writing and often comes with a lot of pressure that makes writing seem like a chore instead of a useful tool.

Here are a few ideas to incorporate writing into your child’s daily routine:

Give them a notebook or journal for writing down their thoughts. It doesn’t have to be expensive, but often something that seems fancy or grown-up to a child can capture their imagination. Special diaries with locks or invisible ink are irresistible to most children.

Encourage them to send letters, cards and artwork to family and friends. They don’t have to be distant friends – dropping off a handwritten card to an elderly neighbor or classmate can be just as special and provide immediate feedback that will motivate your child to write more.

Let your child help you with your daily writing tasks, such as making grocery lists, writing down measurements and jotting down reminders on the family calendar.

Many children enjoy writing their own comics and picture books. Combing writing with art is an excellent way to help your child’s creativity grow while they practice their writing skills. Provide a wide variety of art supplies and look for books that help your child learn how to improve their drawing skills.

Find toys that encourage writing that they can use as props in their imaginative play. A whiteboard or chalkboard or easel can be used to play school, be a menu board for a restaurant, a for sale sign, an advertisement for their play or a danger sign.

Let your child make and display handwritten signs for their room.

Give your child prompts to help them come up with their own short stories or poems. Allow them to read them to the family at the dinner table or during family time.

Help your child get an advantage in school and career by giving them plenty of opportunity to practice their writing skills in a way that is fun and natural to them. Even a few minutes of writing practice each day can be enough to help them become comfortable and fluid writers.

Jacob Maslow is a father of five who has had a lot of practice in helping children learn how to write. He works for online retailer, Today’s Concept: which sells a wide variety of educational and fun toys that ignite children’s imaginations, including the always popular line of Melissa and Doug puppet theaters and puppets.

Jennifer Wolfe

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Have You Hopped This Week?

Posted on November 18, 2011 by Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe

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