Dear baby girl,
You are done with what society has ‘required’ you to do. What’s left is what YOU require yourself to do. That can seem scary and daunting and utterly oblivious to you right now, and that’s precisely the way it should be, I think. I have a few words of advice that might help. For what it’s worth, I hope you pause and consider some life lessons I’ve learned along the way:
First, pay attention. The Universe sends us clues all the time, but only those who pay attention to life really find them. Think of life as a big treasure hunt, and as you move from place to place, from relationship to relationship, and from opportunity to opportunity, pay attention to what’s happening. Look for clues to help move you towards your happiness.
Second, be curious. Don’t let the world pass you by. Ask questions, wonder why things are the way they are. Don’t be afraid to try something new, to talk to strangers, or to cross the street. You are now enrolling in life school, which is so much bigger and challenging and wondrous than any school you’ve ever attended before. Be curious about life, about learning, about people and places and things that happen around you and around the world. Soak it all up and learn wherever you are.
Third, trust yourself. Remember that life has a way of working itself out. Your great grandpa Paul used to always say this, and I’ve relied on these words in times when I didn’t know what to do in life, both big moments and small. What I really think he mean was to trust – trust your journey. Trust yourself. Trust the Universe, or God, or whatever spirit you find guiding you along the way. Trust love, loss, joy, sadness, friends and most of all, yourself. Sometimes that’s the only place to go when something feels really huge. Get quiet and listen to your heart and to your instincts. You have learned right and wrong, what’s good for you and unhealthy, and you know what happiness and love feel like. Most of the time you can figure it out.
And finally, remember there’s no place like home. Your dad and I will forever love you and help you. You will always have a bed to sleep in, food to eat, and loving arms to wrap around you. Unless your life adventures take you out of phone service, we’re always a call away and a plane ride home. We will welcome you, your friends, and your partners. We will listen to your triumphs and your challenges, we will root for you in all things, and most of all, we will love you with a fierceness nothing can tame. We know you are ready, and that college is only the beginning of a glorious adventure for you.
So my dear college-bound daughter, pay attention. Be curious. Remember life has a way of working itself out. And always, always know there’s no place like home.
We love you.
xxoo
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August 12, 2017Jennifer,
My daughter is leaving for college in 4 days and I have been trying to decide what to do for her. I am not a writer and I am horrible with words. I found your letter by doing a simple Google search. Your words hit home with me and inspired me to create a letter of my own. I hope you don’t mind but I used some of your words and thoughts in my letter. I used yours as a springboard and template to create mine. As I typed I had to stop to wipe away my tears. I am proud of the finished letter but I owe you a big thank you! Without your heartfelt letter I am not sure if I could of put my feelings into words. Just know that my daughter with benefit from your letter as I know your daughter did. Thank You again!
Jennifer Wolfe
August 12, 2017Mark,Thank you SO very much for letting me know that my words made an impact on you. And yes! I’m so happy you were able to use them as a springboard…there’s a reason why this is one of my all-time top posts, I think. Parents struggle with this time of life and even when we love to write, finding the words can be elusive. Best of luck to you and your daughter. I know things will all work out.
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February 28, 2016So true, Jennifer, when you write “The Universe sends us clues all the time, but only those who pay attention to life really find them.” Modern times have almost annihilated our ability to look for and capture such signs. Life is a quest of our own path and such signs can help us understand our path. Your daughter is so fortunate to have such a wise mom! =)
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February 28, 2016Thank you, Suzana. Parenting has been such a humbling – and enlightening- experience. I’m so grateful you enjoyed my post.
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November 17, 2015Hey Jennifer!
Not sure if you remember but you were my 5th grade English teacher haha
I got directed here through LinkedIn and thought it was awesome seeing your blog 🙂
Hope everything is wonderful at home!
, Travis
Jennifer Wolfe
November 17, 2015Hi Travis! I’m so glad you found the through my blog…and of course I remember you! Davis is basically the same, as is Emerson. I’m still teaching and writing and traveling. I hope that you stop by the blog again and let me know how you are. 🙂
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Lindsey
August 30, 2014Tears. Love to you both. Motherhood on the page, this letter. xxo
Jennifer Wolfe
August 31, 2014Thank you, Lindsey. Lots of tears around here, too….tears of joy, tears of sadness, tears of missing what used to be. On to a new chapter in motherhood!
My Inner Chick
August 23, 2014—-Mama,
This letter is one to be cherished, copied, saved, shaded, & passed on…
I LOVE it SO so much.
xx
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admin
August 23, 2014Thank you, thank you Kim I know I’ll save it- not sure about her!
Dawn Wink
August 23, 2014Dear Mamawolfe,
“Trust love, loss, joy, sadness, friends and most of all, yourself.” Yes, yes, and yes.
Thank you so much for putting to words what we feel in our heart.
xo
admin
August 23, 2014Dawn, you’re very welcome. It’s the only way I know how to process this soul splitting pain.
Kathy Radigan
August 23, 2014Jennifer this is just beautiful! Thank you for sharing your words to your beautiful daughter with us. Much love to you and much luck to her!
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August 23, 2014Thank you, Kathy. She’s so happy on college, it really does take some of the sting out of it!
Dangerous Linda
August 22, 2014Hi, Jennifer! ~
This is lovely — you’re always making me misty!
What really stands out about your message to your daughter is that it’s all about trusting and experiencing life — in contrast, it seems many of us are full of warnings and admonitions as we send our offspring out into the “big, scary world”.
So sweet! Will you be my mother????
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Jennifer Wolfe
August 22, 2014Linda, My kids have taught me so much about warnings and admonitions…they are both so brave-much more than I ever was-so warnings really do no good. I want them to learn to trust themselves and their decisions…that’s how they can stay safe and happy. ~Jennifer