Communication Conversion

Posted on June 18, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

Honestly – does your teen text you from inside the house? And if they do – do you text back?

What is happening to the art of conversation? Or at least the ability or desire to converse in person?

It’s an interesting phenomenon if you step back and look at it. When cell phones allowed us to go mobile, and speak to whomever whenever we wanted to, Americans thought that was amazing. I called my mom much more often, and it made long commutes in California traffic so much more interesting.

We no longer had to wait by the phone for that special someone to call – whether it was the repairperson or the person we were hoping would fix our relationship status (wait-we didn’t have that term then, either). Cell phones allowed us freedom to communicate all the time.

Then email hit. Suddenly, we didn’t have to wait for business hours to get information-we could ask questions, register complaints or schedule appointments at our convenience. We could break up, make up, or shake up relationships at all hours, and we could do it in the glorious isolation of our homes. No longer could the recipient hear the quiver in our voice, or the howl of pain, or the venom that we felt. All communication was one way, and we had time to think of a witty response.

With texting, a hybrid of phone and email caught on quickly with kids, not so fast with adults. I started texting because I wanted to communicate with my daughter, and since she had quickly deemed email too slow, and phone calls were nonexistent, texting was a perfect option to still communicate with her, and no one needed to know she was talking with her mom.

Her texts are often one to four word responses to my questions, but at least she’s answering, right? She texts me where she’s going, who she is with, and when she wants me to remember to deposit her allowance in her checking account. I get a text when she leaves a textbook at home, or after a particularly tough test at school. Just this morning I awoke to a text from my daughter. Away at summer camp, I guess she misses me?

So when she’s in her room and wants to know what’s for dinner, I get a text. I’ll admit-it kind of bugs me. Why can’t she get off her seat and come ask me? Is she really studying that intently, or is Facebook that alluring? Or am I just being old fashioned? Is this the way my grandparents felt when my mom stopped writing them letters from camp and called instead?

I’m beginning to think it’s a losing battle-texting is here to stay. And I’ll secretly admit it-I occasionally enjoy texting her from upstairs to remind her to do her chores.

Two can play at this game 🙂

photos courtesy of FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Jennifer Wolfe

Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.

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Stand Up

Posted on June 12, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

what do you get

when you stand up

for yourself?

results,

reactions

or regrets?

what do you get

when you sit up

and speak your mind?

relief,

resolution

or regrets?

what do you get

when you shout out

and say your truth?

reassurance,

retreat

or regrets?

me?

I get a little of this

and sometimes

a whole lot of nothing

but

never

many

regrets

when I stand up

sit up

shout out

I get it-do you?

stand,

sit,

shout

shut up

and stay

the same

you’ve always been

Jennifer Wolfe

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Letting Go

Posted on June 5, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

I was just starting to fear the end of little league. Next week’s final game was looming, making me feel uneasy. My 12-year-old’s last season was wrapping up, and I stuck imagining what life will be like without baseball. Beginning with t-ball, then farm, AA, AAA, and finally majors, life has provided a rhythm for a good chunk of our lives.

With baseball not being his first sport, he hasn’t moved into the elite travel ball team status. He plays hard and is easy to coach. He shows up, listens, and performs well under pressure. I was beginning to wonder where he would go next. This doesn’t feel like something the parent of a 12 year old should be worried about-a washed up ball player at his age?

Then, like an answer to my worries, Little League announces a new division-for 11-13 year-olds. A division designed for kids like my son, who want to bridge the gap between Little League and juniors. Something for the regular kids.

But instead of celebrating the obvious solution to my problem, I created a new one. Click over to Yahoo! Shine to read more about my Little League situation, and how we may have a solution.

Jennifer Wolfe

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The Sixteen-Year Test

Posted on June 2, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

Sixteen years ago today I was waiting to give birth to my first baby. Today, I’m waiting for that baby to take her first SATs. The words of my grandmother ring loudly in my ears, reminding me of how fast the time goes.

I always thought that was old people just complaining, whining about missed opportunities and broken promises. I wondered if they wished they had done life differently, had spent more time pushing their kids in the swing or reading them bedtime stories. I briefly considered how that would feel, and tucked it away inside that long list of things I would never do as a parent, a list carefully created over years of trying to correct other parents mistakes that ended up in my classroom.

She was probably in her eighties when I started noticing the pain in her voice as she recalled her glory days of pigtails, freshly ironed short pants and dinners around the oval oak dinner table. Most vestiges of her children were long ago relics of days she cherished, only the occasional tear in her eye as evidence of when she felt truly happy.

Sixteen years ago, I was not thinking of the memories that would be building from the moment she was born; I was thinking of how strong I could be to make it through the labor, and not much else. I worried about how life would change and could I do all the right mommy moves to make sure she was safe, nourished, and nurtured. Never did I think this far into the future that she would be walking out of my car and working towards leaving me.

As I sit here, watching car after car pull in, I tense as the clock ticks towards the starting time. Kids continue to pour in even after they have no hope of admission through the testing door. I watch them come back, rejected, and notice a mom not willing to take no for an answer. Her son protests as she resolutely marches him back in, determined to give him another chance. Minutes later when she returns alone, I see love etched into every fiber of her face; the kind of strength it sometimes takes to be a parent.

Sixteen years ago, I had no idea what it would take to be a parent. I knew it was something I wanted for my life, not understanding the determination, dedication and sheer will it would take. I didn’t understand why it would be so hard to watch her ride off on her bike alone, to let go of her hand at the corner of the school building, or let her take over the car steering wheel. I did not imagine the pain of watching her cry or struggle through friendships that had ended or defeats on the ski hill. I didn’t comprehend the many, many hours I would lose sleep to hold her tight, rock her gently, or support her through the different phases of growing up.

Sixteen years ago I never imagined the tests my baby would put me through, or how she would help me grow into a better human. When she walks back to me today I will welcome her with the swirls of my grandmother’s voice running through my head, and realize that what she said really is true: they do grow up so fast, and the years pass by far too quickly. I will lock this memory into my mind, knowing all too well that when she finishes this test, another will present itself, challenging me to dig deep and take it on.

Jennifer Wolfe

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Education Issues, May 2012

Posted on June 1, 2012 by Jennifer Wolfe

via Pinterest

For many families, May signals the end of the school year. Some parents start worrying about how to keep their kids busy during the long summer days, and others worry about how to afford to keep their kids in college.

This month I thought about these issues and more – how to explain the shrinking job market for college grads, why California is losing bright students to other states, and how the presidential election will influence college financing. Please click on the my article links below, and feel free to share your thoughts!

“College Grads Facing Higher Levels of Unemployment”

FIRST PERSON | As a ninth grade AVID teacher in Davis, California, a huge part of my job is preparing freshmen for admission to the college of their choice. I help them plan their high school schedules to make sure they have their admission requirements satisfied. They register for and complete the PSAT, set up College Board accounts, research and tour all types of colleges, and create a final project highlighting the school of their choice. I teach them the value of a college education, and how much more money college graduates make than mere high school graduates. However, according to Investors.com recent article, “New Normal: Majority of Unemployed Attended College”, I may have to change my message.

Brain Drain: Are California’s Brightest Students Leaving the State?

COMMENTARY | Arizona State University, University of Oregon, Northern Arizona University, University of Nevada-Reno, Oregon State University, and the University of Hawaii at Manoa. What do these colleges all have in common? Each university has seen a triple-digit percent increase in the number of California freshmen students enrolling in their campus. Nearly 27,300 students left California in 2010, up 90 percent in the last decade. California’s declining support of education, combined with large numbers of qualified applicants, has made out-of-state college a very attractive option.

As the number of California students accepted to out-of-state colleges grows, California has increased its own efforts to recruit out-of-state students.

If Romney is Elected President, My Kids May Not Go to College

COMMENTARY | Parents, look out. If Mitt Romney is elected president, the only hope your kids have for going to college is if you can pay for it. Romney’s proposal suggests reducing funding for Pell grants and other student financial aid resources for middle income students, cutting 18 percent of federal education funding, and defying teacher’s unions efforts to maintain manageable class sizes.

There’s a few things Mr. Romney doesn’t seem to understand. Not all parents can afford to pay for college. In fact, for most of the middle class, like me, we work hard, save for retirement, and are being forced to choose between helping our kids fund higher education, or helping ourselves fund retirement. Hard working Americans shouldn’t have to make these kinds of choices.

What do you think?

Jennifer Wolfe

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