I don’t know if it’s just that time of the year that I’m feeling particularly vulnerable – maybe it’s more that time of life, that middle space where what always seemed so probable and certain has suddenly shifted. I’m feeling all at once teetering between so many worlds, so many lives, that every time I plant my feet down they sink, just the slightest bit – but not in a solid, comforting kind of way. In kind of a tenuous kind of way; that shifting of the sands of time that have always, always left me feeling hesitant towards change.
And everywhere I turn, the universe seems to be whispering to me. “Take a leap of faith, dear” swirls around my head in gossamer thin threads, taunting me to listen. It sings to me as I watch my daughter open college acceptance letters, and when she smiles, I know it’s time. It calls to me when I reunite with my son, after many days apart, and when he hugs me in his awkward teenage way, I know it’s near. I feel the vibration of change, that rhythmic sort of shudder that starts in my core and travels up my spine to rest in my head-where I promptly brush it off, dreaming for just one second that life will stay the same.
But I know that’s impossible.
This is the time of life when a leap of faith is the only available form of transportation. It’s the time to dream, to imagine, and to believe in possibility. It’s the time to run, skip, jump…to believe in what was meant to be, and to trust that what I open my heart and mind to will manifest.
It’s time to take a giant leap of faith, and hope for a soft landing.