Mothers,
Do you remember the first moment your child came into this world? That moment, that instant when your life changed from you to them? Do you remember that viscous, writhing weight that warmed your chest and filled your eyes with tears? At that precise moment, mothers, you were there. You were present, you were transformed, you were alive, you were powerful.
And then somehow, along the path of motherhood, things changed. The diapers seemed endless. The crying, the writhing, the fussing seemed interminable and left you wondering what had actually happened in that moment when life became less about you and all about them.
The boundless moments of joy, bearing witness to the first smile, rejoicing in the first laugh, documenting the first steps, shriveled under the seemingly insurmountable loss of you – do you look back at photographs, searching the eyes of the woman who had so desperately wanted that child, and wondering where she was that day?
The sticky hand that searched for yours as you skipped along the sidewalk, eyes gazing down in search of treasures, has long since left your grasp. Do you remember that smile, tiny baby teeth and lips smudged with chocolate? Do you?
Those moments, so seemingly insignificant at the time, harness their power when they’re gone.
The endless “why, Mommy, why?” whispered (or screeched) by your toddler transforms into silence from your teen. The days when you couldn’t wait to strap them into their car seat and take a deep breath disappear as they back their own car out of the driveway. The evenings when you dreamed of a moment alone to just ‘be’ slip into your dreams as you struggle to stay awake to hear their key in the lock.
Mothers, when you hear your mother say the years go by so fast, believe her. Remember that childhood is fleeting, and motherhood lasts forever. But you need to stay awake. Stay present. Rejoice in the glory of the moment.
This post was inspired by the novel A Well Tempered Heart by Jan-Philipp Sendker. Feeling lost and burned out, Julia drops her well paying job at a NYC law firm. After hearing a stranger’s voice in her head, she travels to Burma to find the voice’s story and hopefully herself as well. Join From Left to Write on February 4 we discuss A Well-Tempered Heart. As a member, I received a copy of the book for review purposes.
Jennifer Wolfe
Jennifer Wolfe, a writer-teacher-mom, is dedicated to finding the extraordinary in the ordinary moments of life by thinking deeply, loving fiercely, and teaching audaciously. Jennifer is a Google Certified Educator, Hyperdoc fanatic, and a voracious reader. Read her stories on her blog, mamawolfe, and grab free copies of her teaching and parenting resources.
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Having just married off my adult daughter (and remembering vividly the day she entered the world!), and in the midst of the craziness of two under-10-year-old boys now – I can relate!!
Oh yes, Janaki – I know you understand precisely the fleeting nature of motherhood! I’m (hopefully) not close to marrying off my daughter, but the thought of college next year frequently brings me to tears myself. ~Jennifer
My son is still a toddler, but the phrase “the years are short, but the days are long” are so so so true.
Kelly, they certainly are! It’s so curious to me that often times when we’re in the moment with our toddlers, surrounded by the messiness of parenthood, that what is ‘beyond’ seems so much more appealing. For me, the reality is that while I love every moment with my kids-including our teenage years-I sometimes long for the simplicity of toddlerhood! Enjoy every moment~Jennifer
My boys are older.
I miss those moments.
Sometimes I want them all back to keep them there FOREVER.
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I miss them, too. I wish I had believed then that I would…
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amazing insight. Really enjoyed browsing this blog. Keep up the good
work and to everyone keep on tweeting!
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Thanks Rosetta-I will!
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